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5 Hijabis Get Real on What It's Like to Date When You're Muslim-American
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I was 24 and couldn't even kiss someone without feeling like I was going to hell. After a long silence he asked, 'You've kissed other guys before, right? It felt like a million years before he finally said, jokingly, 'Jeez, I don't know if I can be your first! That's a lot of pressure! Before social media and the prevalence of pop culture, it was a lot easier to enforce whatever ideologies you wanted your child to follow. But as globalization increased, this changed. Young people became increasingly exposed to the rest of the world.
Today, their ideologies and values no longer find a basis in what their priest or imam preaches but in what social media and pop culture influencers might be saying and doing. Then there's the limitless online world. Dating apps and websites that cater to young Muslims looking for meaningful long-term relationships are easy to find. Muzmatch, a dating app launched two years ago, haspeople signed up. Other apps, like Salaam Swipe and Minder, report high success rates for young Muslims who previously had a hard time finding a partner. Startups Cater To Muslim Millennials With Dating Apps And Vegan Halal Soap These apps allow people to filter their searches based on level of religiosity, the kind of relationship they're looking for and other aspects such as whether the woman wears a headscarf and the man sports a beard.
While the men behind these apps launched them with the hope of giving young Muslims a positive platform to interact on, they say there are still many in their societies that oppose the idea of young couples interacting. Haroon Mokhtarzada, founder of Minder, says that a lot of this disapproval stems more from the fear of people in their communities gossiping than it does from the actual interaction the couples have. While Muslim dating is considered a controversial topic, many Muslims are beginning to wonder whether the idea of dating is such a bad thing. Traditionally, the concept of dating while Muslim was frowned upon and was actually considered taboo; however, as Muslim immigrant communities have sprung up in Western countries, traditional views on dating have had to take a back seat and adapt to the ever changing world.
Modern Muslim Dating Forward thinking Muslims believe that Muslim dating is about getting to know each other without the mulim that is associated with dating. And in women-only space, the most conservative black over-garments may be taken off to show designer wear underneath. However, when she has a son, and when her son grows up and gets married, that changes. A friend who had worked in the Middle East told me that whenever anything needed doing, or paperwork signed, they would ask the women, and it would happen. Older women, particularly mothers, can be significant power brokers in an extended family.
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womwn A Deep Concern for Purity This includes moral purity. Often they are worried about the risks of exposure to the sexual freedoms of western culture, and may assume it characterizes all the western women they meet. Thousand Oaks, CA: Journal of Computer-Mediated Communication Psychology Science in the Public Interest Green L Why millions of Muslims are signing up for online dating. BBC News, 9 December. Ethnic and Racial Studies Philadelphia, PA: Temple University Press, pp. Hammer J Marriage in American Muslim communities.
Religion Compass 9: Journal of Communication Oxford University Press. Kaya LP Dating in a sexually segregated society: Anthropological Quarterly San Francisco, CA: Freeman, pp. Report, Washington, DC: Institute for Social Policy and Understanding. Larsson G Muslims and the New Media: Historical and Contemporary Debates.
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Ashgate Publishing. Judgment and Decision Making 3: Lo M and Aziz T Muslim marriage goes online: Journal of Religion and Popular Culture 21 3: Journal of Social Issues Reimagining the Umma. Undergraduate Social Life and Identity. University North Carolina Press. Peek L Women, gender, and marriage practices in the United States. Joseph S ed. Family, Body, Sexuality, and Health. Brill, pp. Contemporary Islam 5: Journal of Computer-Mediated Communication 20 1: Sociology of Religion 64 2: Communication Research Washington, DC: Pew Research Center.
Communication Research Trends Tidwell L and Walther J Computer-mediated communication effects on disclosure, impres- sions, and interpersonal evaluations: Human Communication Research Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin Walther JB Computer-mediated communication: Computers in Human Behavior Walther JB Theories of computer-mediated communication and interpersonal relations. SAGE, pp. Journal of Comparative Family Studies Her research interests include parsing out intersections of communication, technology, identity, and culture.
In her work, she focuses on how people use medi- ated technology to initiate, maintain, and terminate close relationships with family, friends, and romantic partners. While she frequently asks questions from a critical interpretive perspective, she approaches research by focusing on the pragmatic questions and readily employs a mixed-method design.